mixmatchd : you loathe me
mixmatchd : *giggle*
raspberryhamster : with a great passion. i think of you and i'm like "ew, shea, he smells."
mixmatchd : I DO NOT SMELL! That is jame's job
raspberryhamster : i'm always like "get some deodorant, shea!"
mixmatchd : I WEAR DEODERANT DAMN IT!
raspberryhamster : well you sure do smell like you don't.
mixmatchd : I'm gonna slit my wrists now!
raspberryhamster : i'll make sure there's tons of flowers at the wake to cover your stench.
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 12:33 AM

Wednesday, July 14, 2004

 
raspberryhamster : if you were a marketable product... what would your slogan be?
mixmatchd : ...
mixmatchd : I'm going to blow you up
raspberryhamster : so, what's your slogan?
mixmatchd : MY SLOGAN IS MAGIC FUCKING MISSLE ASSHOLE!


Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 11:24 PM

 
raspberryhamster : if you were a marketable product... what would your slogan be?
old_sock27 : "he's a good thing to have...tres me"

Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 11:09 PM

 
Parasite Eve 589: I have a pic you can put on the cast thing. If you're still doing pics.
alyrai: not at the low levels.
alyrai: you have to make it to the top 10.
Parasite Eve 589: How do I do that?
alyrai: be funny.
Parasite Eve 589: Do I have to strip for you?
alyrai: that might also work.
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 10:52 PM

 
alyrai: you're here just in time for the question of the moment - want to give it a shot?
less than messer: meh maybe
alyrai: pffft.
less than messer: ppfftt
alyrai: the question, if you decide to answer it, is...
alyrai: if you were a marketable product... what would your slogan be?
less than messer: man everything that pops into my head is so sexually perverse that it makes me cry inside
less than messer: that's not my slogan that's a statement... about slogans
alyrai: sexually perverse isn't bad.
alyrai: here at evil muffin, we encourage sexual perversion.
alyrai: as long as it's funny.
less than messer: :-less than messer: well first, "do not take orally" popped into my head
alyrai: ahahahahaha.
less than messer: then I said, no that's too wrong
less than messer: then I decided I'll just steal one and thought, "Tough on dirt, gentle on carpet." Then I paused then I :-\ed again
less than messer: what a card I am
less than messer: kids these days
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 10:21 PM

 
alyrai: if you were a marketable product... what would your slogan be?
ninja634: um...probably be some kind of food...my slogan would be, Jesus loves it, so should you...
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 10:15 PM

 
alyrai: if you were a marketable product... what would your slogan be?
Turboking3: "simon... not that good but what the hell"
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 10:12 PM

 
Parasite Eve 589: Guess what?
alyrai: what?
Parasite Eve 589: I'm naked right now....*nerdy laugh*
alyrai: hahaha.
alyrai: i might EM that, just because at least once a year someone has to say that.
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 10:01 PM

 
Parasite Eve 589: That slogan wasn't mine.
Parasite Eve 589: I have to re-do that.
alyrai: awww. daaaaamn you.
Parasite Eve 589: So ask again.
alyrai: um, ok.
alyrai: if you were a marketable product, what would your slogan be?
Parasite Eve 589: "Mary Jo will do it. She will do it nine times"
Parasite Eve 589: I don't know.
alyrai: ahahahahahaha.
alyrai: HERE, MARY JO, HAVE A TROPHY.
Parasite Eve 589: I hope it's a pizza trophy.
alyrai: How about a... french toast trophy?
Parasite Eve 589: No....
Parasite Eve 589: "When insanity knocks....answer the door naked" There's my slogan.
alyrai: ahahaha, niiiice.
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 10:01 PM

 
alyrai: You! It's Question Of The Moment time - want to give it a shot?
Tylerkirkland: sure
Tylerkirkland: now?
Tylerkirkland: jk
Tylerkirkland: go ahead
alyrai: If you were a marketable product... what would you slogan be?!

and then he didn't say anything. Tyler loses.
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 9:56 PM

 
xvintage pantsx: so, what would your motto be if you were a marketable product?
xvintage pantsx: or slogan, rather.
alyrai: oh damn... i actually have no idea.
xvintage pantsx: whooo... then I got you? or something.
alyrai: it would probably be like "i might poison you when you least expect it... but i make a mean batch of french toast!"
xvintage pantsx: mmm, well when they hear the latter they'll be like
xvintage pantsx: french toast? totally rockin.. who cares about the poison
alyrai: french toast... WITH STRYCHNINE.
alyrai: except not really. french toast is sacred, i wouldn't do that.
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 9:55 PM

 
alyrai: Hey! You! It's Question Of The Moment time - want to give it a shot?
xvintage pantsx: word, I'm down.
alyrai: If you were a marketable product... what would you slogan be?
xvintage pantsx: I'll sleep on your couch, eat your food, and make out with your sister (if she's cute)... FREE OF CHARGE!!!!!!
alyrai: niiiiiiiiiice.
alyrai: come near my sister and i'll hit you with a very heavy object.
xvintage pantsx: well.. I'm not for young ones
xvintage pantsx: ;[
xvintage pantsx: except
xvintage pantsx: I am a young one.. technically
xvintage pantsx: but you know what I mean.
alyrai: yeah. she's 10.
alyrai: her boyfriend would probably come after you, too. he's 11, and a feisty one.
xvintage pantsx: crap, I'd get my ass kicked.
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 9:53 PM

 
alyrai: If you were a marketable product... what would you slogan be?
Parasite Eve 589: "Don't touch my butt and I won't touch yours"
alyrai: If I /do/ touch your butt will you touch mine?
Parasite Eve 589: Yes ma'am
alyrai: Sweeeeeet.
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 9:44 PM

 
For years you've loved the combination of randomness, self-deprecation, and general stupidity that Evil Muffin has brought you in it's original format - AOL Instant Messenger.

But now, you can enjoy the magnificent pleasure of Evil Muffin in two brand new, tasty flavors.

IM Aly and amuse her with Yahoo! Messenger - raspberryhamster
Or MSN Messenger - kaleidescopic
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 12:20 AM

 
Turboking3: i shoud get a name change?
alyrai: what do you mean?
Turboking3: i think i woud make a good tim or stive
Turboking3: dont you?
alyrai: nah. stick with simon.
Turboking3: i dont know tim woud be prity sweet
alyrai: nah.
alyrai: because then people would call you timmy just to piss you off.
Turboking3: damn ... your right
Turboking3: what about Belkin... that would be cool
alyrai: too elf-y.
Turboking3: yeh... elf's piss me off
Turboking3: what about "Tex" or "Big Tex" now that would be fantastic
alyrai: you could... but i'd be worried you'd be prone to callin' th' cops fer bein' discriminated ageenst.
alyrai: even though that was wyoming and not texas.
Turboking3: hahahaha that guy was a fucking ass!
alyrai: he really was.
alyrai: it's my life goal to make at least one joke about him every week for the rest of my life.
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 12:19 AM

Wednesday, July 07, 2004

 
1. Danielle (37)

2. Juan (32)
3. Messer (24)
4. Chris (21)
5/6. Dana/Bill (20)

7. Nick (19)
8. Brittney (15)
9. Brad (14)
10. Cha-- er-- Bob (11)

11. MaTTY (7)
12/13/14/15/16. Roxy/Mckayla/Tyler/Eli/Brandon (5)

17. Jess (4)
18/19/20. Jeff/Shea/Kathleen (2)

19/20/21/22/23/24/25. Ashley/Hugo/Vinnie/Billy/Some Guy/Mary Jo/Jared (1)


C'mon, people! It's summer! GET FUNNIER!
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 10:33 PM

Thursday, July 01, 2004

 
alyrai: oh man, you haven't heard the story of sheridon, wyoming?!
ninja634: nope
alyrai: OK.
ninja634: will you tell me it?
alyrai: please picture gavin's advisement on the last day of the trip. we're all tired, cranky, and we haven't showered in forever.
ninja634: ok, gross picture, go on...
alyrai: we're taking the road trip home and decide to stop for some breakfast in the little town of sheridon, wyoming.
alyrai: we go to mcdonalds and we're all getting our food. at one point, jeff already has his and is getting a straw. i run up behind him and poke him, he pokes me back, i run away - this is tradition.
ninja634: lol,ok
alyrai: there are some college-aged farmer boys sitting nearby who, as soon as i'm gone, say to jeff, "so is that your sister?"
alyrai: jeff says "uh... no." and walks out to go eat his food outside. about five minutes later, i have my trust milkshake and i go to get a straw.
alyrai: one of the hicks says to be "do you know what ah heard 'bout redheads?", because my hair was red at the time
alyrai: he proceeded to say something exetremely vulgar which i refuse to repeat.
alyrai: now, at the time i knew i should have said something. something like "yes, will do you know what i heard about boys from wyoming? sheep. lots of sheep."
ninja634: lol
alyrai: unfortunately, i didn't want to cause a problem, so i just stormed out of the place and went to sit and drink my milkshake
alyrai: sheryl and i got into a nice feminist rant about who gives those fucks the right? and no one else really said much.
alyrai: about ten minutes later, i'm calmed down and we're all playing frisbee in the parking lot.
alyrai: those guys come out and get in their car, then roll down the windows and look like they're about to say something.
alyrai: jeff flips them off.
ninja634: heh
alyrai: the guy flips out. he starts screaming at jeff.
alyrai: jeff's like "i just didn't like the way you spoke to her in there." and the guy is freaking out, "that's not how we do thangs in wyomin!"
alyrai: now, you know jeff. he's not exactly a tough-looking guy.
ninja634: yep
alyrai: this guy was, like, 6'3 and a well-built farmer boy at that.
alyrai: he starts yelling, "you stay righ' there, boy!" and opens his door. i'm like "oh shit... this is going to get ugly..."
ninja634: heh
alyrai: he opens his door...
alyrai: puts his feet out...
ninja634: oh the suspense
alyrai: and pulls out his cellphone and says, "ah'm callin' th' cops on you!"
ninja634: lol
alyrai: at which point i lean over to mj and eve and say, "i've got $10 that phone isn't even on."
alyrai: he proceeds to talk to the "police".
ninja634: lol
alyrai: "yes, ah'm bein' harassed by some kid from up north... looks like he's twelve.. yes... ah told him thas' not how we do thangs in wyomin..."
alyrai: (i shit you not, those were his exact words...)
ninja634: fuckn' hicks, lol
alyrai: (i'd like to point out that our liscense plates said "COLORADO"...)
ninja634: lol
alyrai: (i'd also like to explain some rudimentary geography to you... COLORADO IS SOUTH OF WYOMING...)
alyrai: and, oh, it gets better.
alyrai: he says, "yes, ma'm, ah feel very discriminated ageenst..."
alyrai: ohmigod, those seven words will never fail to make me laugh.
ninja634: ha, definantly
alyrai: then he "hangs up" the phone and says to jeff, "you stay righ' there, the po-lice are comin'!" and drives off.
alyrai: does he honestly believe that we think he called the cops? wtf?
ninja634: heh, like how he left
alyrai: they would have had him stay there to file a report... it wouldn't have mattered if he felt discriminated against... it's not illegal to flip someone off...i could have charged him with sexual harrassment... i mean.. jesus...
alyrai: as he drives off, though, and this is the very best part... gavin turns to us all and says, "alright, now... on the count of three everyone give him the finger! 1... 2... 3..."
ninja634: lol, thats good shit right there
alyrai:
Aly was not drunk when she posted this at 9:31 PM